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Talking it out on a forum, in a support group or with friends is good.
- Diet and exercise are good.
- Get some sleep, even if you have to hire in-home help to be with your loved one. You can't function without a basic amount of sleep.
- Diversion such as a movie, book or favorite TV show is good.
If these don't work you need to do more.
- Get a complete physical and be honest with your doctor about your feelings about your life.
- Ask to be checked for infections such as a UTI or low grade sinus infection if you are dragged out.
- Ask if the doctor thinks you should see a counselor.
- Ask if an antidepressant is needed.
I know. I know. You are saying when will I do these things and how will I pay for them? That was my response to such suggestions. I laughed at the idea of finding time to go to a support group. This is where computers and forums like AgingCare are such a blessing. I didn't have that release during most of my active caregiving years.
I skipped mammograms and was lucky. A friend of mine skipped hers and when she finally got around to it, she found she was in stage II breast cancer. Amazing how she found time to take care of the disease then. And that took far more time than a yearly mammogram and the lumpectomy she likely could have had if the cancer had been caught earlier.
During my heavy duty caregiving years, I skipped physicals in general. Again, I was lucky, but I did develop rheumatoid arthritis (RA), an autoimmune disease. Autoimmune diseases are very common among caregivers. RA is in my family, so I may have developed it anyway. But I developed it at an odd time in my life. And yes, RA took - and takes - time to manage. Would I have gotten RA if I'd given myself more down time? There's no way to know. But more downtime wouldn't have hurt me, and quite frankly, it wouldn't have hurt my elders, either.
During those heavy years, I didn't exercise like I did when my kids were young. I ate junk food. I was too tired to care. None of this was good. My sister teases me that I now preach about what I didn't do. And she's right. I didn't take care of myself very well.