Mom lives alone and looks severely malnourished. How do I know if she's eating?

There are prescriptions that can help you mom gain an appetite. My mom was the same way, i'm not always there to make sure she eats a good balanced meal, but with her taking this medicine, I DO KNOW she is eating.

KIDS - there is a saying I recently heard, "Once a man, twice a child." Your mom is now in many ways like a child, one wouldn't expect a 5-year old to have the capacity to shop, cook, clean, eat properly, and wash up on their own. That same stage has returned to your mom.

You'll need to take the appropriate steps necessary to make sure she gets help, be it Meals-on-Wheels, daily pickup to a Senior Center for breakfast, a daily visit by someone, etc.

In my experience, talking to the docs, to her, won't do much.

I noticed that my Mom eats one good meal a day and thinks she's getting enough nutrition. She is also convinced that she cannot swallow, however, she eats everything when she is visiting us or we go out to eat.
I have given up using reason or having docs convince her...never works. She is at a phase in her life that when talks herself into something, there is just no way to persuade her otherwise.
There is only so much you can do and then the rest is up to them.

i have clients that are 87 and 85 years old. they get no exercise except for a tiny walk and therapy. the women eats nothing except desserts and is skinny. she has demenia and skakes alot. the man eats but still eats alot of desserts, he had a strike before and is partially paralyzes in one side. he complains alot of lower pain right below his stomach. what can sugar do to them? the family thinks that they should eat sweet so they don't lose weight.

Desserts are OK and sugar provides calories that go down easily, which helps if you are underweight - BUT - you do have to make sure the diet is not protein deficient if you rely on that for most of the intake. Cheesecakes, Peanut butter cookies and cups (if fat tolerance is OK), things with lots of egg and milk if not allergic could help with that. The other problem would be fiber on an all -dessert diet, and then the stomach pan should be diagnosed and treated if possible. Ulcers or gastritis limit appetite and can cause a lot of weight loss too.

PS - Should have sugar is OK for calories - IF you are non-diabetic.

My mom has dementia and was very depressed after my dad died. Eventually I noticed she wasn't eating much of what we would buy at the market so I got her on Meals with Wheels. After a short period of time I noticed she wasn't eating their food either.... That is when I decided that she could no longer live alone. Trying to have a logical discussion with her was impossible....once they have dementia its like talking to children.....

There is a great company that delivers nutrient-dense, FRESH (not frozen), affordable meals to the home and they deliver in all lower 48 continental United States. They specialize in nutrition for frail elders at home and for disabled people. The meals stay fresh in the refrigerator and take 2 minutes in the microwave to be ready to eat. I do not want to violate the guidelines for submitting information to this website, but if there is an appropriate way that I can share the name/website of the company, it is a great resource.

My sister would often stop to see her 90-year-old friend and mix up a nice whey protein shake for her. The woman started to count on this, and did very well with that nutritional boost. She made it thick, like a pudding, and room temperature. I believe the combination of the social and bonding aspect of this little gesture, and the intense nutrition of the shake, made all the difference in her life.

My family have addressed this problem with my Mom not eating by frequently visiting her throughout the week, and including with any activity with a full meal (either at a restaurant or at one of our homes). She always cleans her plate.