I have been present at 100s of deaths as an RN. Some people were in a sort of deep sleep or coma for some time. They did sometimes rally for moments or minutes toward the end. Some were much more awake through the entire transitioning. The things I best remember is the person who is dying moving away from family--seeming "busy" in thoughts of other things. Don't know if this is life review, dream state, drug state, or what, but this was the most difficult time for families. I did not hear of any lights or tunnels but I OFTEN heard of people who had died coming for them, waiting for them, "just over there; I see John, " type of a thing. One young girl dying of leukemia I recall being terrified and talking always of not wanting to die, not ready to die, coming out of a sleep and saying she saw her brother and knew he was waiting and that she wasn't afraid and wanted to go to him. She was never afraid after that. The parents had lost two young adult children if you can imagine. One to HIV, and one to cancer.
I have wrapped many bodies as an RN, and always told people not to let me teach others, as the hospital lost a gown with every body I wrapped and that's what I would teach. I felt a profound respect for the fact that this was a whole person, and entire life. I am an atheist, but to me the wrapping of a person after death was a "sacred" task. A gentle slow task. I would not let a person go naked into a plastic zipped bag. I also did a biding for time. Some patients who were Buddhist of certain sect did not allow a body to be moved to morgue refrigeration for 8 hours. Would sit vigil with the person. For me I quite liked this. I don't know why. Give the cells time to make their exit? Something I just "felt" that still makes no logical scientific sense.
It may or may not be a surprise that after death the body becomes quite a lot more beautiful as rigor sets in. There is a smoothing and a relaxing that can make for a look of years younger and profoundly at rest and peace. If family can stay a bit this is sometimes very comforting to them, tho it is but a normal physical phenomenon.
I was involved in many codes. Worked on a telemetry floor stepdown where we saw monitors and knew AT ONCE to get in there with the crash cart. I brought back some few and transferred to ICU/CCU. Only in ONE instance did the person afterward when asked tell me of any "afterlife" experience and I still remember his name was Frank. He told me he saw no light and no tunnel, but that he was gone (and he WAS) when we ran in and that he saw me and he saw Robin and knew it was us working over him (something he should not have known) and he felt like he was hovering over us until he returned to his body.
So, after many, many experiences over a long career that's what I am left with. I say talk with them, gently, of wonderful times you remember, that you will be fine, that you will carry them with you and see the world through them. Or that you understand and know they did their best. I think don't expect a response. It has always seemed to me that they hear loved ones as through a light fog, much like little kids returning from a holiday at Grandma's with their parents in the front seats of the car murmuring gently and the kids between waking and sleep, gently lulled by the loved voices.
About all I can say about death and my experience EXCEPT for this. I look forward to death as the last trip of a lifetime. I do not envision an afterlife but I believe our exit is amazing. I do fear pain, torture by medical system, but ZERO fear of death itself. I believe I go where I was all those centuries before I was born. To peace.
Yes, I was present when my husband passed away. I told him he could leave if he wanted to because our sons would take care of me. He took a deep breath and died.
I feel his presence in several ways. He used to smoke a pipe and I smell pipe smoke at times. My youngest son has smelled the pipe smoke several times when walking his dog.
During the holidays, I had several candles from the dollar store turned on. To date, there is still one candle that comes on at night. This has been going on for about six weeks.
I know my sweetheart is still around me. Love never dies.
Yes, I was with my Mom for days before she died while on hospice. Early on, she would reach up to the ceiling and talk to her brother and sister who passed many years ago, telling them to "pick me up". When she actually breathed her last, I was holding her in my arms - head cradled in my armpit, talking to her in her ear softly and stroking her forehead. It was a dark dreary day. The room windows were closed but the curtains wide open. As she took 3 last breaths, a light beam broke through the clouds and moved up her body from the her feet to her head. She breathed out onto my cheek and died. Just as fast as it came, the light disappeared and the dark clouds came again. The room was so quiet, so calm, so peaceful ...and it felt like she had "left". I will never forget those last moments ...engrained in my heart and brain forever.
Do you mean like seeing the soul leave the body? Seeing someone who is not there? Or just a feeling your LO is gone. I have not had any of these experiences but I was not there at the time my LO died. My Dad went in his sleep. Mom, had closed her eyes one day, wouldn't get out of bed the next and was gone 2 wks later. My nephew, last person who needed to visit, and I went to see Mom. We left at 1:30 and Mom was pronounced at 1:50pm. Nurse said she sees it all the time. They wait for that one person.
When anyone is transitioning from this life into the next, loved ones who have gone before are always present to help them transition into the next life. Some people who have this gift can actually feel and see their LO’s spirit as it leaves his/her body. Sometimes they can smell their perfume, etc. When my mother died in July of 2002, I was about 3000 miles away and I was having dreams about her death for three nights straight and that’s when I got the call that she died. When my sister-in-law died in December of 2021, for two nights straight there was a light that appeared above my bed. I did not know what the light was until on the third day I got the call that my sister-in-law had died. At the time of her death I was about 4,300 miles away.
To answer your question, it is possible to see and feel your LO’s transition from this life into the next.
Thank you so much for sharing. When I lost my mother, I also felt an atmospheric change. This is the best way I can describe something that words cannot adequately describe. I posted my question because I wondered if I was the only one with this experience.
I was right there beside my mom when she took her last breath, I had been holding her hand until she skipped a breath or two and both my sister and I realized the end was very close. No, I didn't feel or see anything that could have been interpreted as supernatural.
I purposely left both my mom and dad's room before they died so I would not be left with that final memory of their last breath branded in my mind. Now I wish I'd stayed so I may have experienced what MANY do, as the soul leaves the physical body....that whooshing sound/feeling that happens.
I have seen lots of signs from dad though, after he passed. Nothing from mom that I can pinpoint. I also had a dream/visitation from dad shortly after he died which was comforting,
My uncle was comatose for quite a few days when one day, he sat bolt upright in bed, a wide grin on his face and eyes open wide. "MAMA" he yelled, very excitedly, a few times, hands reaching up to the ceiling. He died the next day.
My grandmother called me from the hospital and while her mind was intact, she was in such poor shape. Was 92 and had been in some form of pain or another since 1983 when she was almost killed by a drunk driver. Had COPD and was terribly anxious or afraid of just about everything.
She called and sounded more calm and rational than I’d ever heard. Told me how she was tired and she loved me. As soon as we hung up, I knew. I knew I’d just talked to her for the last time. She was telling me goodbye.
The next day, she went comatose and sent to the ICU. She died the next day with family by her. I sang “Amazing Grace” next to her head as she drifted away. Very peaceful. I don’t recall any odd thing happening. Just went to sleep.
She died the day before my 42nd birthday. My other grandmother died the day after my 16th birthday. Both were comatose at their deaths but somehow knew to not die on my actual birthday. I just can’t chalk that up to coincidence.
I have absolutely no desire to watch someone die. It would break my heart to see someone whom I love with all my heart draw their last breath. I would never want that to be my last memory of them.
My parents knew that I loved them. I spent lots of time with them. Never once did they tell me that they expected me to be there at the time of their death.
I adored my grandmother. Years ago she said something to me that I have never forgotten, “Give me flowers when I am living and can appreciate them. I won’t care about receiving flowers after I am dead and gone.”
My grandfather planted a beautiful rose garden for grandma. I gave her flowers all the time because she loved them. I bring flowers to her grave but I know it’s because it makes me feel good, not because she expects me to.
If it is meaningful for a person to be at someone’s bedside when their family members or friends die, then they should be.
Many times a person will die after a person leaves the room. My oldest brother died the second I left his room at his ‘end of life’ hospice facility.
Personally, I don’t ever want to see someone die. I really hope that I die before my husband because it would absolutely crush me to see him die.
I have wrapped many bodies as an RN, and always told people not to let me teach others, as the hospital lost a gown with every body I wrapped and that's what I would teach. I felt a profound respect for the fact that this was a whole person, and entire life. I am an atheist, but to me the wrapping of a person after death was a "sacred" task. A gentle slow task. I would not let a person go naked into a plastic zipped bag. I also did a biding for time. Some patients who were Buddhist of certain sect did not allow a body to be moved to morgue refrigeration for 8 hours. Would sit vigil with the person. For me I quite liked this. I don't know why. Give the cells time to make their exit? Something I just "felt" that still makes no logical scientific sense.
It may or may not be a surprise that after death the body becomes quite a lot more beautiful as rigor sets in. There is a smoothing and a relaxing that can make for a look of years younger and profoundly at rest and peace. If family can stay a bit this is sometimes very comforting to them, tho it is but a normal physical phenomenon.
I was involved in many codes. Worked on a telemetry floor stepdown where we saw monitors and knew AT ONCE to get in there with the crash cart. I brought back some few and transferred to ICU/CCU. Only in ONE instance did the person afterward when asked tell me of any "afterlife" experience and I still remember his name was Frank. He told me he saw no light and no tunnel, but that he was gone (and he WAS) when we ran in and that he saw me and he saw Robin and knew it was us working over him (something he should not have known) and he felt like he was hovering over us until he returned to his body.
So, after many, many experiences over a long career that's what I am left with. I say talk with them, gently, of wonderful times you remember, that you will be fine, that you will carry them with you and see the world through them. Or that you understand and know they did their best. I think don't expect a response. It has always seemed to me that they hear loved ones as through a light fog, much like little kids returning from a holiday at Grandma's with their parents in the front seats of the car murmuring gently and the kids between waking and sleep, gently lulled by the loved voices.
About all I can say about death and my experience EXCEPT for this. I look forward to death as the last trip of a lifetime. I do not envision an afterlife but I believe our exit is amazing. I do fear pain, torture by medical system, but ZERO fear of death itself. I believe I go where I was all those centuries before I was born. To peace.
I feel his presence in several ways. He used to smoke a pipe and I smell pipe smoke at times. My youngest son has smelled the pipe smoke several times when walking his dog.
During the holidays, I had several candles from the dollar store turned on. To date, there is still one candle that comes on at night. This has been going on for about six weeks.
I know my sweetheart is still around me. Love never dies.
To answer your question, it is possible to see and feel your LO’s transition from this life into the next.
All I felt was sort of a whooshing sensation that I cannot really describe. Like the air goes out of the room all of a sudden.
I believe that is the 'feeling' of the soul leaving the body. I can only say that to me, this is very comforting and quite spiritual.
Some people talk to people who are in the room, that we can't see. That's also quite lovely.
I look at death (at least of people who have lived a long life and are ready to go) as a passing from one room into another.
I have seen lots of signs from dad though, after he passed. Nothing from mom that I can pinpoint. I also had a dream/visitation from dad shortly after he died which was comforting,
My uncle was comatose for quite a few days when one day, he sat bolt upright in bed, a wide grin on his face and eyes open wide. "MAMA" he yelled, very excitedly, a few times, hands reaching up to the ceiling. He died the next day.
She called and sounded more calm and rational than I’d ever heard. Told me how she was tired and she loved me. As soon as we hung up, I knew. I knew I’d just talked to her for the last time. She was telling me goodbye.
The next day, she went comatose and sent to the ICU. She died the next day with family by her. I sang “Amazing Grace” next to her head as she drifted away. Very peaceful. I don’t recall any odd thing happening. Just went to sleep.
She died the day before my 42nd birthday. My other grandmother died the day after my 16th birthday. Both were comatose at their deaths but somehow knew to not die on my actual birthday. I just can’t chalk that up to coincidence.
My parents knew that I loved them. I spent lots of time with them. Never once did they tell me that they expected me to be there at the time of their death.
I adored my grandmother. Years ago she said something to me that I have never forgotten, “Give me flowers when I am living and can appreciate them. I won’t care about receiving flowers after I am dead and gone.”
My grandfather planted a beautiful rose garden for grandma. I gave her flowers all the time because she loved them. I bring flowers to her grave but I know it’s because it makes me feel good, not because she expects me to.
If it is meaningful for a person to be at someone’s bedside when their family members or friends die, then they should be.
Many times a person will die after a person leaves the room. My oldest brother died the second I left his room at his ‘end of life’ hospice facility.
Personally, I don’t ever want to see someone die. I really hope that I die before my husband because it would absolutely crush me to see him die.
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