I took my brother and sister to court four years ago to prove elder financial abuse. I dropped the case believing them when they told me they wanted to work things out, only to find out they convinced our dad I should be disinherited for questioning their actions.
My father is almost 90 years old, is disabled and dependent on the son still living in his home. I took the advice of a local prosecutor and recorded them and took some videos to have as evidence. Just to name a few... both stating they can't find the money they might as well just go to jail, my father instructing them to fund the trust with mom's estate which they assured us both it was put in, my sister trying to convince dad my brother was the beneficiary of a life insurance policy left by mom... I discovered dad was the beneficiary, my dad stating at least ten times Mom's estate should be in the trust, my brother refusing to give dad a budget, I ask why he is tolerating this, he tells me because he lives here and I can't do it alone. My brother telling the estate planning attorney dad didn't receive a pension, dad had no idea, I discovered he did receive a pension. My father knows nothing about his finances my mom handled everything.
I believe i was put back in dad's Will with the hopes this would keep me quiet, I'm sure they have a new Will ready to replace this one that will not include my name. Just to be safe, both my brother and sister made sure they were both named DPOA'S and are permitted to use dad's money to gift to anyone, any amount they choose. The clause that was in the POA document, intended to protect my father from financial abuse which allowed beneficiaries to request an accounting of my father’s assets from the POA was taken out. So now I'm being told they don't have to tell me what my father received in my mother's estate, I'm no longer entitled to know. If my father says he doesn't care what they do with his money they won't be held accountable for misappropriating trust funds, I suppose it’s okay for a trustee to lie to a beneficiary. Is there really such a thing as a fiduciary? How could anyone not see that he is a victim of undue influence and is being financially exploited? I just don't get it! No wonder elder financial abuse is such a problem in our country. Maybe the perpetrators of the elderly would think twice before financially abusing an elder if there weren't so many unethical attorneys using loopholes to protect the perpetrators. They justify their actions by claiming they were just doing what their client wanted. How can a Judge not be able to see the big picture?
Never let an attorney make your business decisions for you, they are NOT qualified to do so. Their job is to advise you of the legal ramifications based on what you want to accomplish, make out legal documents and represent you in court.
Attorneys in general do not make sound business decisions, that is not their strong suit.
With judges there is no big picture, remember they are just humans as well and have their own shortcomings.
Sorry about this, although it is very common.
I know you know that because you have been there.
Unfortunately it seems you dropped the case. Why you would do that, knowing the evidence of wrong doing, I can't know.
You are correct that not judge or attorney can see "the big picture". But what they can and do ask is that those giving care bring in documents and accounting. These papers account for the assets or they do not.
I think the law does the best it can but in toxic family drama they are somewhat helpless with the craziness that goes on sometimes for decades.
I wish you the best and hope you have proof lined up and a good attorney.
Your profile lists Dad as being 99 but your post to us here lists his age at 90. You may want to correct one for clarity. I hope you will update us.
I've learned that this is not always the case. After the case ended without prejudice, my attorney agreed to give me 10 minutes to answer a few of my concerns. Documents that were given to my attorney included information that could have been very useful, unfortunately, he overlooked them. Particularly, the clause in the POA document, which I was told I was not understanding it correctly, I do have him stating this in writing! It was later confirmed that I was correct, it meant exactly as I thought.
It's an awful feeling to learn that your attorney betrayed you too.
I'm not really sure if there is anything that can be done about an attorney that gives bad advice which causes further complications and flat out lies to you.
Thank you for your response and good wishes and for the heads up on my mistake made in my profile! I'll let you know the outcome! Take care!
I assume if you were originally taking your siblings to court over this, you had an attorney; what did that attorney advise you?
You refer to unethical attorneys using loopholes to protect people who financially abuse elders - to what loopholes are you referring?
If you still feel as though there is financial abuse happening, and you have the resources, you might want to hire a forensic accountant to "follow the money".
Keep in mind, however, the theory of diminishing returns - you might end up spending more money on this situation than you might recoup after dad dies and his estate is settled. Especially if dad "outlives his money and it is needed for his care.
Best of luck dealing with this. I have seen some pretty gruesome behaviors because of money, I , personally, believe that it is sometimes better to let them have at it and walk away. Maybe dad can give you a financial gift now and then it won't matter what happens after his death.
I would think someone would find it a little fishy that his original estate plan wanted his money protected and now he basically doesn't care what the DPOA'S do with his money. Especially when they are the ones that took him to the appointment, he is dependent on, one still lives in his home and I have him recorded telling me my siblings told him to sign the document! Clearly this is undue influence!!!
Thanks for responding!!!
FYI no one is legally "entitled" to see someone else's Will before they pass. No PoA or trustee is legally obligated to disclose the finances or management details to anyone who is not also a PoA or trustee other than to the principle.
I agree, typically a POA is not obligated to share the Testator's financial information, however, as I mentioned, a clause was added to the POA Document which gives anyone named as a beneficiary in my father's Will the right to an accounting of my father's finances, therefore the POA in this case is obligated to provide information pertaining to my father's finances.
The trustee of an irrevocable trust is obligated to provide beneficiaries with and accounting. If the beneficiary requests to see bank statements, the trustee is obligated to show them as well.