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Ever since he married her in 1969 she had done everything in her power to exclude our family. She is very narcissistic and controlling. My brother is now not in a position to stand up for himself.

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How did he end up being back with his ex after they separated?

If you haven’t ever been close to your ex SIL, then I am sure that you don’t expect her to fill you in on anything now.

I guess you could do a wellness check from the police if you haven’t seen him in awhile. You could also contact APS if you are extremely concerned about his well being.

I am sorry that you aren’t able to freely communicate with your brother. I hope your brother will find the help that he needs.

You have every right to be concerned. I cared for my mother with Parkinson’s disease. She needed a great deal of help and could not have been left alone all day.

When is the last time that you spoke to your brother? Does he enjoy being with others?

I tried to get my mom to go to the senior community center and she was more of a homebody towards the end of her life. I even offered to attend with her for awhile but she still resisted going.

I was concerned that she wasn’t getting adequate socialization. She was so tired all the time. One doctor appointment would wear her out for the rest of the day.

Speaking of doctor appointments, is your ex sister in law taking him to his doctor appointments?
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From the OP's profile
"I am concerned about my brother who has Parkinson’s with hallucinations and delusions. He is living with his ex wife who at 80 continues to work and leaves him alone during the day. I go once a week to spend time with him but that is not enough interaction for him. Given his mental conditions, it’s hard to know if what he is telling you is fact or his imagination. His ex wife and sons who live out of town have medical directives for him . They do not keep me informed as I am just his sister."

If you feel that your brother is being neglected, you can call Adult Protective Services and report that he is a vulnerable adult in need of care.

Are there Adult Day Centers near where he lives that he could attend?

Have you called the local Area Agency on Aging to find out what services might be available?
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